There’s a lot of talk and internet memes around the New Year about reinventing oneself and changing. But, I have to say, I’m pretty proud of the current me! Sure there are some things I can improve upon, but totally changing is not my goal nor is it realistic.
I’m in an interesting position this year because I’m in the middle of treatment for breast cancer. Naturally, this has changed my perspective on a lot of things but especially about how much control I actually have over what happens to me.
Not the year I expected
Last year around the New Year, I dubbed 2018 “The Year of Tara.” I went back to a steady job in my field for the first time since having kids, I trained for and completed the Monument Ave. 10k and was feeling great… until August 1st when I was diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer. The final 5 months of the year were a blur of chemo, surgery and changing how I view my world and my relationships.
With radiation and a final reconstruction still on the horizon, so much of what is happening in my life is set around a treatment schedule and not the calendar schedule. This makes me realize that it’s a little naive to think that opening a new calendar means a whole new you.
I look at how I handled what 2018 threw at me
and I’m very happy with how I navigated my way through. I’m also in awe of the friends and family I have around me. I think they’re pretty great and I hope none of them try any dramatic changes in 2019 because they’re fabulous as-is.
Not a Fan of Traditional Resolutions
I’ve never been a fan of traditional resolutions. It’s always felt forced and non-sustainable to me. Instead, I’ve been setting intentions for my year, two years ago I focused on gratitude and last year it was kindness. I saw changes in my behavior and thoughts when I kept these themes in my mind every day.
I like to boil my intention down to a word or two to make it easy to keep top of mind. I’m still grappling with how to define my intention for this year. I struggle for consistency and want to develop habits that are sustainable and work with my lifestyle. That means no short term diets or cleanses or workouts I can’t sustain physically or financially. This also includes not taking on too much whether that be material items that are unnecessary or commitments that stretch me and don’t align with my passions. So – consistency? Streamlining? Focus? I’m going to play around with those terms for a couple of days and see what resonates.
Change of Perspective
Facing cancer made me realize I don’t have the time or energy for all of the extra stuff we tend to fill our lives with. I want to live my best life now. For me that means taking who I’ve become and eliminating all the extra things that clutter my life and mind. That leaves me with more time and energy to enjoy my friends and family. “
My wish for you, Dear Readers, is that you find time this year to celebrate the amazing person you already are and that you handle the good and bad in 2019 with grace and authenticity!