A Sonnet to Aldi


Aldi, A Love Sonnet

I grab the bags, a stray quarter, and smile happily while your doors welcome me inside

My girls sneak snacks in the buggy, but I’ll never know the difference

Because your costs keep my bill so low, my wallet beams with pride

To think about all the money I’ve spent on organic milk elsewhere brings out my bitterness

Blue cheese, feta, and three different flavors of goat cheese—I don’t care! My obsession can totally thrive here.

Why, yes, it is hard to write a grocery plan. This place is like Ikea with produce; I’m not going to find it all

But I remember how unbelievable these prices are, and my patience will endure

Strawberries for one dollar, avocados for 69 cents?! I have to stop and catch my breath when I see the beautifully priced alcohol.

We’ve got rosé, pinot grigio, and cabernet, too. And oh yeah, all for $7/bottle.

I’m definitely grabbing the organic ground beef to make a mega batch of meatballs!

The whole bring-your-own-bag doesn’t bother me—or the crazy, rushed checkout. I’m saving so much money, I’m not going to cause a debacle.

That’s right! I just scored a whole week’s worth of groceries for $150. Now, we can actually start saving for my dream trip to Montreal! 

Oh, Aldi, I do look forward to your weekly hidden gems. 

But I especially appreciate my trail mix stock-up that saves us from much hangry mayhem.